Engagement Party Speeches:
Guidelines for Preparation

"He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me!"

Engagement party speeches: the not so secret ingredient behind giving a good one is planning ahead plus preparation and practice.

Trust me, that seemingly effortless easy eloquence you admire in others will have been very carefully rehearsed!

So for those who want to deliver heartfelt and memorable engagement party speeches, here are some guidelines. Adapt them to suit your circumstances.

Remember this is NOT the wedding speech. That is ahead of you. What is needed now is a brief (1 - 2 minutes) speech marking and celebrating the commitment to marry.

Engagement Party Speeches - Who Speaks

Who delivers engagement party speeches depends on the style of the event.
Is it formal? Or informal?
Who is hosting the party?

Traditionally the event is held by the bride's family and the father gives the opening speech.

However things are not always traditional! The speech could also be delivered by the groom-to-be, the bride-to-be, the mother of the bride or groom, a close friend of either of them, or a much respected senior family member. A speech in reply and/or other speeches may be expected depending on the circumstances.

When in the course of celebration is the best place for the engagement party speeches?

The most appropriate spots for a speech are at the beginning, after everybody has arrived, just before eating or cutting the cake if you have one and at the close of the function.

Check with the party organizers when they have scheduled your speech.

Engagement Party Speeches - Content

To make your speech flow easily from idea to the next and to include all you want to express it's essential to plan.

You'll need an opening, a speech body where you give your main ideas or thoughts about the engagement, and a conclusion.

In the opening:

• introduce yourself. There may be guests who don't know you and your relationship to the couple.
• welcome everybody. If there are very special guests or people who have gone to extraordinary lengths to be present mention them by name.
• give thanks to everybody for coming together to share and celebrate the occasion.

In the body of your engagement party speech:

• share a story or anecdote about the engaged couple/your daughter/son/best friend
• share the pleasure you feel as a result of the engagement

In the conclusion of your speech:

• express your hopes/wishes for their future
• and finish with a toast

Engagement Party Speeches - Writing the Content

• Give yourself time to prepare. Don't skimp on this step! It really does underpin your success.

• Gather some ideas together. (Relax, they don't have to be perfect.) Beginning will kick-start the creative process and soon you'll find you have more engagement party speech ideas than you can use and you'll be able to choose the best ones.

  But before you put pencil to paper though consider your audience and the purpose of the speech. Leave out references to potentially embarrassing or humiliating incidents, vulgarity, sensitive topics and jokes which only a few understand.

  The goal here is inclusively celebrating the couple's new commitment. Alienating groups within your audience isn't what you want to be doing!

"Love one another and you will be happy. It's as simple and as difficult as that." Michael Leunig

• Use these content ideas as starting points:
  1. interests/hobbies/sports etc that the couple share
  2. their meeting - where and how they met
  3. how you knew the relationship was serious
  4. a quotation, song fragment or poem that expresses an aspect of the couple's relationship you admire
  5. family background
  6. childhood hopes, dreams and happenings

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  Engagement Speech Samples
  Read our 5 example engagement toasts from a father, mother, friend, groom and bride-to-be and use them as a starting point to write your own.

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• Pick the best of your ideas to form the body or middle of speech and then add the opening and conclusion.

• Test it by reading it aloud. Is it too long? Too short? Does it make sense - flow from one idea to the next easily?
  Revise if necessary.

• Once you think you have your engagement party speech more or less how you want it, give it a trial run in front of friends or family.
  Ask them to listen to make sure you're covering everything you wanted to appropriately and that you've left nothing really important out.

Engagement Party Speeches - How to say them

Having invested so much and care in writing the speech it would a total shame not to deliver it well.

The key to great delivery is simple - practice. The more practice you do, the easier it will be to give your speech effortlessly. The starting point is to know it thoroughly so that you are not relying on reading it word for word from a piece of paper.

Cue-Cards

If you need assistance recalling the flow of material consider cue cards.

Reading your text doesn't have the same audience impact as using note or cue cards or no notes at all.
Click the link to find out how to make and use cue cards.

Rehearsal

Once you know the flow of your material (and have made your cue cards if you are going to use them) practice your speech by rehearsing in front of a mirror (to see what you are doing while you speak), repeating it over in your mind as your commute, and saying it aloud where ever possible.

Practice speaking clearly, slowly enough for everyone to take in what you are saying and loudly enough for them to hear.
Click the link if you'd like some more how to rehearse tips. These will help you fine tune your performance.

When the day arrives and the moment for delivering it is upon you, stand and take your place confidently.
Before you start make sure you standing comfortably, take a deep breath in, smile, and begin. You will be fine!

There are more pages to help with preparing engagement party speeches. These are:

• sample engagement toasts
• a large and deliberately eclectic selection of wedding poems and readings. Many will be absolutely right placed in an engagement party toast.
• help to deal effectively with any nervous apprehension you may feel about delivering your speech: overcoming fear of public speaking
• the site map for write-out-loud.com. You'll find links to pages specifically about how to write a speech, using vocal variety, how to use humor effectively and more.

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