The humorous speech

 - when funny is NOT enough

It was that time of year in the Toastmaster's Calendar for the humorous speech contest.

Black and white theater masks

Who would enter?

I decided to. I hadn't entered that particular contest before, despite having given numerous humorous speeches, sometimes even intentionally. It would be a challenge, a stretch and who knows, it might even be a laugh!

So what happened?

I chose a topic and mixed the ingredients carefully.

There was:

  • melodrama - exaggeration and hyperbole
  • a pun or two
  • absurdity
  • characterization - the taking on of other voices in storytelling
  • use of gesture & deliberate movement around the stage
  • seeds of truth - enough to make it real
  • use of alliteration
  • examples of irony
  • rhetorical questions - to hook the audience
  • interactivity - an invitation to join with me in singing
  • changes of pace - slow, medium, fast and very fast
  • changes of pitch & volume
  • use of the dramatic pause

In short all the elements I know that make up "funny" in a humorous speech.

You'll find many of them discussed here on these pages:

That is, except ONE ...

And that one teeny-tiny oversight was the largest of them all.

I'm tempted to write its name in a very little font because I'm embarrassed. This is definitely from my "should-have-known-better" file.


Quite simply I did not practice with an eye on the clock. If I had, I would have realized my speech was too long. The result was inevitable. I got disqualified for going over the time allowance.

What I hadn't thought through was the laughter.
People laughing take up time! You have to wait for them to finish before you go on.

And neither had I thought through my own capacity to respond to laughter. I got bigger and better in delivery. The "biggerer and betterer" I got, the longer I took. Until ...

... suddenly there was the red light. For those of you who don't know, the red light in Toastmaster's means STOP. No more. Sit down.

 The take-away lessons

Here are my lessons, learned the hard way:

  • Time waits for no man (or woman) not even funny ones. A time limit is finite. As that famous old Shakespearean wind-bag Polonius ironically says; "Brevity is the soul of wit".

  • Practice may have made perfect but I'll never know because I didn't give myself the opportunity to find out.

  • Practice as if you were performing and if possible with an audience.

  • Practice with a stop watch but more than that know the time you are taking for the introduction, middle and end.

  • Be prepared to ruthlessly cut if you find you're over time. Start with any multiple examples you've used to illustrate a main point.
    The weakest of these go first. Repeat until the entire speech is comfortably under the time limit.

Practice, practice and then practice some more ...

You'll know what I'll be doing next time the humorous speech contest around.

And there will be a next time because one of the many benefits of Toastmaster's is that there is no real or permanent failure. There is experience and experience can be learned from.

My career as a humorous speaker may not have begun triumphantly but it is not over yet!

Ha, ha, ha, hee, hee, hee, giggle and chortle!
How to write great funny speeches
All the information you need to get them laughing including a superb example with explanations.

The text for my speech is here. I converted it to a PDF with the thought that others may appreciate learning what-not-to-do from it!