Maid of honor speech for your sister
How to write a short, simple, sincere speech
By: Susan Dugdale | Last modified: 07-30-2020 | First published: 09-01-2010
Understandably many women feel a little daunted about writing a maid of honor speech for their sister!
After all, this is an important task. You love your sister and the last thing you want to do is embarrass her. But just what do you say?
What are the best words to reflect your relationship with your sister? How do you sincerely share the happiness you feel for her and her new partner-to-be?
And where, on earth, do you begin?
The answer is here. It's straight forward and simple.
Grab a piece of paper, a pen, and start with a brainstorming session. Then follow the maid of honor speech template/outline below.
You'll come out the other end of the process with a short, simple and sincere speech: one that really does honor your sister. Read the example speech and see for yourself!
Do a brainstorm to organize your thoughts
The first step toward writing the perfect maid of honor speech for your sister is to collect your thoughts together, review them and then decide which of them you want to share.
The brainstorming process
The best possible way to do that is to brainstorm - simply jot down ideas about the points you think you want to touch on in your speech, just as I've done in the image above.
Allow yourself complete freedom to explore as many ideas as you can. Do not edit yourself!
Remember shared experiences - the good times, the hard times and the funny times. Think about the qualities you admire in her.
Put down whatever comes into your mind. Don't stop to worry about whether it's good, bad or appropriate. You'll review it later, and definitely don't stop to check your spelling!
If you run out of paper, get another piece. Keep going until you can genuinely think of nothing more.
You do not need to write full sentences or paragraphs - just notes. You want enough words to trigger your memory about what you thought would be good to say and that's all.
Picking the best material from your brainstorm notes
Next you will pick the best of these ideas and organize them into the 5 sections of the template below. This will give your speech a logical structure - a clear beginning, middle and end.
Obviously, the tone - that is, whether the speech is funny, amusing, sentimental or sincere you'll decide for yourself. That's governed by the stories and ideas you choose to share and the language you use to express them.
Read an example maid of honor speech for a sister
The example maid of honor speech I've written is based on the notes I used when I created the brainstorm image above. It's split into five parts; one for each of the sections needed for your speech. As you scroll down the page you'll see them in a call-out box below the notes explaining each section.
1. The introduction to your maid of honor sister speech
In the introduction it's customary to identify yourself because there may be guests who don't know you and don't know that you are the bride's sister. Next you welcome the guests, thank the bride and groom for letting everyone share in their day, and then you thank your sister for the privilege of being her maid of honor and the best man for his speech.
a day, Mary!
when we were kids, how we dressed up in Mom’s old party dresses?
Put a white table cloth on our heads and march around, singing, “Here
comes the bride, fair fat and wide.”?
name is Jennifer, and this beautiful woman, this stunning bride –
the antithesis of “fair fat and wide” is my beloved little
laughed ourselves silly over that game. Now here we are 25 years
laughing. Mary’s not wearing a table cloth. And this time it’s
am honored to be asked to speak. Thank you.
you too, to all of you, for coming to share this day with us.
Especially Frank’s family.
know Mary adores you, almost as much as she does us. It’s
wonderful seeing our families all together to celebrate this
2. History with the bride
Next, you could share a humorous or anecdotal story about the bride from your childhood. This will give the audience a picture of your relationship with her, and also set the tone for the rest of the speech. Whether you choose to write something funny, serious or sentimental, the most important thing to remember is to be genuine.
pair of us, share thirty years worth of loyalty and love: with an
occasional sisterly quarrel thrown in. The usual sort of thing. Her
snitching my favorite pair of jeans, without asking, and looking
better in them when we were 17 and 15 years old. A bit of phone
snooping...nothing major. Certainly nothing a bossy big sister
shared a bedroom for a long time as kids. That means you go through
cycles of liking, loving and loathing each other. Sometimes all at
jeans was definitely loathing.
way she took my side over not eating Brussels sprouts was sisterly
solidarity. Mary & me united against parental cruelty! I liked
what was truly excellent, was our bed time stories – the ones we
told each other. As soon as Mom turned off the light and closed the
door, we’d pick up from where we left off the night before.
favorite was the classic tale of a prince (handsome) arriving in the
nick of time to rescue the beautiful damsel in distress, from some
dastardly fellow, or a particularly nasty situation.
rejected stories about girls having a fabulous time up to their
elbows in grease rebuilding a vintage car in the garage. We wanted
lace, lots of it and happily ever after, down the aisle.)
our stable of handsome princes, the handsomest prince of them all,
the one we both swooned over was Darren. Darren was a super-super man
created for us, by us. He was brave, brilliant, strong, just like
Dad, and let us do whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted. (Not like
he ever go out to work? Nah. Did he ever tell us we had to rescue
ourselves? No chance.
was always there. Always ready. Always had time and always, always
knew what to do. Darren was masculine perfection.
can’t remember the exact moment when this fine fellow left.
I do know Frank had quite an act to follow.
3. Life before the groom
This next section focuses on who your sister was and what she was doing before she met her groom-to-be.
For example, maybe your sister was focused on her career and never expected to find her life-partner. Or perhaps she was travelling the world when she found her match. Or perhaps she fell for the guy next door whom she's known since she was eight.
There are a couple of things to watch out for.
The first is to be mindful about sharing anything that could be overly embarrassing for anyone - your sister, her new husband, your family and friends.
In addition to that, please don't fall into the trap of sharing a tale or something about your sister that no one can relate to except for you and her. If you do that you'll find yourself looking at puzzled faces.
3. Life before the groom
my sister dreams, she dreams big, and then she makes it her business
to have them come true.
school was followed by college which was followed by the career she’s
always wanted – to be an editor and read for a living. The pinnacle
of bliss for a 'booky' girl! A job enabling her to bask in the
afterglow of a successfully relocated sentence terminal: aka a period
or full stop.
proud of what she's achieved, how she balances her life, somehow
making time for everything. She’s graceful, organised and appears,
unrushed. (A trick I need to learn!)
along came Frank.
4. The romance
Next, transition to a paragraph about your sister and her husband. How did they meet? How has the groom changed your sister’s life?
You can talk about how inspiring their relationship is to you or share a humorous story involving your sister and new brother-in-law.
This part doesn’t have to be very long, but it's necessary as it brings your speech into the present. A good way to conclude this portion is by formally welcoming the groom into your family.
4. The romance
she swoon? Was she in a ghastly situation – a set of parentheses
many? And nowhere obvious to put
You’ll have to ask her yourself.
I’ve learned about Frank over the last six years ...
six years! And you all thought it was tough waiting for her to get to
the church. 10 minutes. Diddly-squat,
compared to what she put him
learned leaves us in no doubt he’s earned her hand in his.
man loves books just as much as she does. Hard to believe, but it’s
true. Both of them live by the wisdom – when in doubt go to the
library- you’ll find the answer to everything there. Some people do
bar crawls – these guys do libraries.
And book stores, and rescues – tatty, out of print treasures from
kind. He’s thoughtful. He loves walking in the country side,
chocolate, and his dog, a golden lab called Fido.
think Fido was the clincher, with dark chocolate close behind. Plus
books, his ability to listen, to laugh – in short to be there for
her, and for each other, day after day, night after night, page after
page, chapter after chapter.
There are many possibilities for a conclusion. You could end with a quote, joke, spiritual advice, a toast or simple congratulations. Do try to keep with the tone you’ve set in the rest of the speech and end with what feels most appropriate for your sister.
Pooh! He’s been well and
truly replaced by the real thing and we couldn’t possibly
imagine a better partner for her.
and gentleman please join me in congratulating Mary
and her handsome prince Frank. May
they continue to share
their love story for many,
many happy years.
I have other pages which you may find useful. For instance: